Things Have Changed for Me (And That's Okay)
by Glowsquid2000
Summary: "So instead of accepting people into my life, I push them away before they can reject me. I guess I have some walls up." After the Battle for Earth has been won and Sendak defeated, Kieth realizes the alternative might not be as scary as he thought Bonding Moment 2.0


"Hey."

Keith could hear Lance jogging to catch up with him as he made his way from the hangars to the main part of the garrison. He slowed his pace, allowing the other paladin to catch up and trusting that Lance knew that meant he was listening.

"We should have a secret handshake."

Whatever Keith had been expecting, it wasn't this.

"Why?"

"I don't know, I'm just feeling it. You don't choose the secret handshake, the secret handshake calls to you. Now that we're friends and I'm your right hand man and all."

Huh. Friends. Keith had never thought about it before, but he supposed it was true. Several months ago he never would have expected it but there was no denying that that's what Lance had become. A friend. It was there in the ribbing and teasing, the unwanted hands ruffling his hair, the competitive jibes. Keith had found those things irritating at first. Most of the time, he had to suppress the urge to fight back. Until he figured out that was just Lance trying to be his friend. Trying to reach out to him. It was his way of saying _I'm here for you_.

Now that Keith flew the Black Paladin and Lance flew Red, their roles had changed, and Lance took his position as Keith's right hand very seriously. Somehow, Red's brash and impulsive attitude had made Lance... steadier. He was still the goofy, rambunctious guy he had always been, but he had grown more serious since Red had chosen him to be her paladin. Keith saw it in the narrowed eyes as Lance practiced with his bayard, how he stuck close to Keith's shoulder in diplomatic situations instead of letting his mind wander as he might have done before.

When Keith broke down in the wake of Shiro's disappearance, Lance was there, holding him close as he cried and not even acknowledging the snot and tears Keith was getting on his jacket.

No matter the situation, Keith didn't have to look far to see blue eyes catching his from across the room, their question quiet but sincere: _Are you okay?_

Keith didn't know what to do but _thank his lucky goddamn stars_ for Lance.

Lance must have taken his silence as refusal, because he hastily retracted.

"Unless you want to keep things simple. The single macho up nod works just fine. We don't have to -"

Keith stopped walking, turning his whole body to face Lance head-on. "No, Lance, I do. A handshake would be cool. How should it start?"

Lance, as always, bounced back instantly, face lighting up like Christmas.

"Fire! Okay, um… I actually haven't thought about the actual handshake part yet."

Keith knew jack shit about secret handshakes, but he figured if Lance could put himself out there to suggest it, Keith might as well return the favor.

"Why don't we start with a classic high five," he suggested, holding his hand up flat as he tried to ignore the way his fingers trembled.

Lance tapped it with his own, holding their palms together as he said, "Awesome. Then again with the backs." He twisted his wrist and Keith copied him so that the backs of their hands were touching. "Now what?"

"Now it's your turn to pick something," Lance said.

"Oh. Okay. Er, how about a fist bump?"

They bumped their knuckles together.

"Now hook your little finger with mine," Lance waggled the digit in question. "Like you're doing a pinky swear."

Keith complied, then wracked his brain. He didn't know what kind of things usually went into a secret handshake, but he couldn't let his apprehension show.

"Um, I don't know. Let's tap our thumbs together. Twice."

"Really?"

Keith could feel the tips of his ears flushing pink.

"I don't know, okay? You're the one who started this."

Lance shrugged. "Okay then. _No problema_ , fearless leader." It took a bit of fruitless thumb-wiggling before they managed it.

"Okay. now let go and give me a high five like we're gonna do that handshake-to-hug thing."

Keith complied, slapping his palm to meet Lance's and clasping their hands together.

"But before we get to the hug part," Lance continued, their hands clasped between them, "pull back and snap." He demonstrated, swinging his arm to the side and snapping his fingers, the sound muffled by the gloves of his armor. Keith followed suit. It felt kind of ridiculous, but not enough to try to argue.

"We should take our gloves off if we're going to do this right," Lance said. "Here, let's go from the beginning, see what we got."

Keith didn't have a problem with that, so after he and Lance had stripped off their gloves and tucked them into their belts they went from the top. High five, back hand, fist bump, pinky swear, tap tap, clasp hands, snap. It wasn't difficult to remember, and Keith liked the rhythm of it.

They ran through the whole handshake twice more before Lance asked, "Do you want to add onto it? Or leave it as it is."

Keith thought for a second. "I say we leave it as it is for now. If we want to add more later we can always make something else up."

Lance smiled, teeth dazzlingly white. "Awesome. I was gonna go eat, you wanna come?"

The invitation made Keith realize just how hungry he was. As soon as they had been discharged from the medical ward, the whole team had thrown themselves back into work. There had been so much to do. Rebuilding infrastructure, distributing supplies, freeing the last of the prisoners from work camps. They were training hard too, keeping both their piloting and combat skills sharp. It had taken a toll on all of them, and Keith wasn't sure he hadn't forgotten to eat breakfast that morning. Huh. No wonder he was starving.

"Sure."

Lance slung an arm around his leader's neck as they started to walk and without thinking Keith leaned into the touch.

It happened so smoothly, like it's the easiest thing in the world and suddenly Keith is completely beside himself. He didn't know he knew how to do that. He welcomed Lance's affection like it came naturally and the surge of emotion in his throat almost made him pull away.

Because first of all, since when did people casually hug Keith Kogane?

More importantly, when the hell did he get used to it?

But Lance's half-hug is genuine and warm and real. So Keith silences the awful voice in his head telling him to pull away, to shove the arm off his shoulders and stride off alone. Because he's a man now, not the lonely, angry, miserable boy he used to be. He's a defender of the universe. He's part of a team.

The overjoyed expression on Lance's face is evident when Keith reciprocates, wrapping his arm around his friend's back, keeping him close. They walk the whole way to the mess like this, hip to hip.

And it really isn't the worst thing in the world at all.


End file.
